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So I let the worm out ONE of the cans. Rob isnt stupid and he asked me to be truthful with him during the time period that we broke up and I did. Even though we arent together, he tells me he cant deal with it. I dont understand him because he was the one in the 6 mth relationship whom he already confessed he loved the girl and wanted to have a family with her.

He asked to talk to me today. All of a sudden, Im to blame. He is a great person and he has a beautiful heart, but Im not ready to let him back in my life yet. I still want to see thats "out there". I know that it may not be promising, but I THINK Im ready to take that risk. Of losing someone that loves me, wants to marry me and be with me. I just dont think Im ready for that with him now because he had his time.

Part of me is scared of losing him but Im sorta kinda interested in someone else. I have jealousy issues with everything I been through yes and I vow not to get into anything (even if its with Rob) if I cant learn to fix myself. It wouldnt be fair.

Im looking foward to this weekend. I need a drink, really baaaad.