Weekend

I'm in a bit of a dilemma. Rob has asked me to make a choice. Like I care for him and I love him deeply, but theres nothing there for me anymore. I mean that's how I feel. He does a lot for me to show me hes trying, but whats gonna happen when he gets comfortable again? What's gonna happen to Laura, Natasha, Naline and Gillian? I cannot be with him again. He will always continue to feed into their ego's. I know he's a great person, but this wont ever be. He read me out and told me that he knew I didnt love him the same anymore. I dont touch, laugh or play around with him like I used to. I spent 2 yrs apart from him, I think I lost that feeling.

I am very happy to say that I am able to move on. But where? Where will I go from here? I am working on myself but it would be cool to share this with someone. The process of being in another realtionship and having to work on it is soo stressfull. After Rob I did have my share of interests. One I really was deep in for but he went back to his ex. Such is my fuckin luck aint it? I been told Im beautiful, smart, and nuturing. Part of me feels like I have to be like every other girl. Simple. I do take off my piercings out of respect for my elders but for me its self expression. It's how I express myself.

I also found myself liking someone whos just a friend a little too much. I need to pull away before I get hurt. I value my friendship with him and I'm not sure how he feels for me. He compliments me from time to time but I'm still unsure. He is definently someone I would like to get to know personal but Im not in to play games, I'm in for keeps. I'm scared to tell him how I feel. Until then, I vow to not make a move on a guy. I dont think men like that much anyways.

I just need to focus on me, me, me.